The Toe Poke Daily is here every day to bring you all the weirdest stories, quirkiest viral content and top trolling that the internet has to offer, all in one place.
Wigan's new mascot is a pie
On the eve of the new Championship season, Wigan Athletic have unveiled their brand-new club mascot.
A reference to the local region's mastery of savoury delicacies, the Latics have formally welcomed "Crusty the Pie" to the DW Stadium.
Introducing Wigan Athletic's mascot for the 2019-20 season: 'Crusty The Pie' 🥧 pic.twitter.com/MPjRd1uvEM— ESPN UK (@ESPNUK) August 2, 2019
See, football mascots don't all have to be anthropomorphic household appliances or terrifyingly nightmarish hell-demons. Some can just be big cuddly pies.
Sadly, it's not all good news on the mascot front.
Indeed, German club FC Cologne have been forced to announce that their beloved matchday talisman, a live billygoat by the name of Hennes, is stepping down with immediate effect due to ill health.
🐐 Due to health reasons, Hennes VIII will bid farewell on Sunday at the season opening. He will live on as the former mascot in Köln Zoo. His successor is already living in the zoo. #effzeh https://t.co/1U4aLSnf4m— 1. FC Cologne (@fckoeln_en) August 1, 2019
Nice to hear that a successor has already been lined up. Here's wishing Hennes VIII a swift recovery and all the best in his retirement.
Of course, these two are just a drop in the ocean of football mascots. Here are some of the worst, or perhaps some of the best. ... You decide which.
Referee plays the harmonica like a whistle
While officiating the recent preseason friendly between Tiptree Engaine and Stanway Rovers Reserves, the referee in charge suddenly realised he didn't have a whistle to use.
Thankfully, an impromptu replacement musical instrument was quickly sourced and put to good use.
Tiptree went on to win the unusually melodious game 3-0.
Roma poke fun at Malcom's move
Remember when Brazilian winger Malcom appeared set to join Roma, only to change his mind and move top Barcelona instead? Well, Roma's social media team certainly does!
Malcom started just six game during his only season at Camp Nou and on Friday was sold to Zenit, with the announcement leading to this 'tribute" from his (almost) former club.
It was all done in good humour and fair play to Zenit's admin for playing along!